Hoboken Style | Taken by ChrisGaldi.com

AskMen.com | Top 10 Parties of 2010 –

No.7 – St. Patrick’s Day in Hoboken

Where: Hoboken, NJ
When: March 17th

Perhaps the only party so good it gets Manhattanites off the island and into Hoboken, St. Patrick’s Day in this neighboring post-college town is the stuff of legend. Wilder and more concentrated than the big boys in Boston and Chicago, the town’s commuter-friendly transportation (you don’t need a designated driver) and plethora of bars and house parties make this a yearly bash for the ages.

Hoboken throws a better St. Patrick’s Day party than Boston.  First the Yankees win the World Series.  Then the Jets make it further than the Pats in the Playoffs.  Now this??  Does Hoboken Style needs to drive up to bean-town and take a victory lap?  Send him into the harbor to pirate the shit out of a couple duck boats?

What gives computers the right to make their own interpretation of the lowercase letters ‘a’ and ‘g’?  Have you ever tried writing out a computerized ‘a’ or ‘g’?  You would have to be an artist to get it in the ballpark.  They are on the same level as Chinese characters.  With their levels of complexity, you would think each one would at least represent an entire word.

I never really understood bi-sexuals.  I take it that they are really horny people though.  The type of horny where a breath on the back of Anna’s neck will get her pants off.  They’ve got that “fuck it, I’ll screw anything” mentality.  Always down to party.

People who like the book more than the movie disgust me.  It is the same crop of creeps who say they like United Kingdom’s version of “The Office” better than Steve Carell’s.  They make these claims just to sound exclusive.  It is the same batch of bears who refuse to eat their rice with a fork, and insist on using chopsticks.  You can’t eat rice with chops sticks…it just isn’t practical. It is also not practical to enjoy reading a fucking book over watching an epic movie.  Do you know why The Passion of Christ did so well in the box office?  Because it blows The Bible out of the water.

If I say to someone that I just saw a movie and loved it; replying back to me that “the book was much better“, is an inappropriate response.  It’s like if a smoker asks a stranger for a lighter, and they respond “I don’t smoke”.  That wasn’t the question fucker.  I asked if you had a lighter, not a nicotine addiction.  To be honest you look like the type who would get-off on burning your ball hair.  Just lend me the lighter you use for that.

Become a Fan of Another Random, yet Extremely Specific Facebook Page (Click Image Below):

Thin Guys Smoking Cigars

Fat Guy Smoking a Cigar

Fat people make smoking cigars look poetic.  It’s as if the cigar becomes an extension of their fucking face.  Not to mention they can smoke half the cigar without it ever leaving their mouth.  A thin guy would pass out if he tried to do that.  Babe Ruth, Winston Churchill and Danny DeVito all smoked cigars, and they smoked ‘em well.

The funniest shit is when a thin guy tries to smoke a cigar while acting like a boss.  He ends up looking like a fucking boner.  That’s my new thing by the way….calling people boners.  I think it really hits home.

Check Out These Boners

“What is smaller than an ant’s mouth?”

The food an ant eats.

~RVJ

Under my program the government will tax the top 1% in America heavily, and in return give them the following concessions:

1)  Allow the top tax bracket to park in handicapped parking spots.

2)  Give the top tax bracket (1) free PBA card each year.

3)  Only allow the Top Tax bracket to drive in the HOV (carpool) lanes.

4)  Allow them to cut the line at county golf courses.

The government will also initiate the following programs to raise money:

1)  Allow US citizens to merge their drivers’ license and their debit/credit cards into one (ie: Charge Drinks to Your Drivers’ License).  Then you would only need to bring (1) thing with you to the bar.  Charge $10 to have the card made.  I am assuming everyone in America will want one, so this would raise $3 billion.

2)  Legalize Weed and Tax it.

If these changes went into place people would be determined reach the top tax bracket since it would give you an elite status.  I guess it is a step toward the Feudal System; but fuck it, we got one foot out the door already.

Are they Serious with the 6'-8" Tall Guy on the Sample Florida License?

Please observe the height of Nick Sample from Tallahassee.  Fucking goon.

Apple will release only 20% of the estimated iPad sales volume in order to drive up demand for the product.  In other words: you’ve got a better chance of shitting in a Saran wrapped toilet and staying clean than you do of getting an iPad on its launch day.  Hipsters are going to butt-munch for this shit.

Why Do Eyelashes Stop Growing at a Certain Point?  Every other source of hair needs to be trimmed: armpits, faces, heads, pubics, ass.  Yeah, I shave my ass. So what’s with the lashes?  They stop growing like teeth.  Difference is that if you lose a tooth it doesn’t grow back.  Eyelashes on the other hand have the capability to grow.  If you cut/pluck one, it will grow back to its original length, but not longer.  This is my concern dude.

They should figure out how this shit works and sell it as a cosmetic creme designed to prevent excessive hair growth.  Quite honestly I am sick of dropping $20 every couple weeks on a hair cut.  I kind of wish I could just choose a length and lock it down like an eyelash-length.  I wouldn’t mind rubbing some on my ass as well -> I’d leave a 1/4″ inch of fur all the way around my round.